This evening as I was coming back from Ashford Strand I stopped off in the Rolle Quay to get the measure of the new landlord. I'm glad to report that he keeps his pipes clean and the pint of Tribute they serve in there was delicious. I took me usual seat in the window looking out over the quay when some movement going on by under the bridge drew my attention I peered out over the way and soon it became obvious that what I was looking at was a whole nest of Barum's infamous cat sized rats. Their presence throughout the town has caused something of a folk panic in recent weeks. if recent reports are to be believed the town is suffering levels of infestation by these super-sized rodents only superseded by the onslaught of a plague of biblical proportions.
Anyway concerned as I am with the habits of all manner of vermin and seeing the opportunity to make an extra bob or two I decided to take a closer look. I left the pub and approached the quayside stealthily so as not to disturb the buggers as I looked down to the river's edge I caught a quick look at one or two of the beasts before they scarpered back to their lair and to my amazement I was struck by the fact that what I was looking at was not bloody giant rats but beavers. Yep beavers, who'd have thought it. Beavers on the River Yeo! I headed back into the pub and announced to one and all the results of my findings. However, the regulars met my claims with a great deal of scepticism and most of 'em continued drooling into their pints. In one of my fits of consternation I stormed out not before levelling a few choice words of valediction at the miserable buggers. If they weren't
Interested in my thrilling wildlife discovery then I knew a man who would be. So when I got back here I got my old buddy Johnny on skype he was having his dinner, a nice hogs puddin followed by junket and cream, but he was happy to help me out. It turns out that a few people had got on contact with him over the last view days about these giant rat sightings so he'd taken his video camera down to the river beneath long bridge to see if he could get them on film. Like me he realised soon enough that what he was looking at were not giant rats nor infant were they beaver but they were coypu. Coypu they don't half look like beavers but apparently they are not an unusual sight on British waterways even though they are native to Peru so they are a sort of large aquatic guinea pig. I suppose like guinea pig they might prove to be rather tasty and with a bit more meat on them than their Andean cousins. Now there's a thought coypu pasties. Where's me rabbit nets?
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